Who am I? Of course you should find out by yourself, because whenever I describe myself it could be wrong. My impression about myself might be different from "the real Jan". But there are some things, some facts I can tell you which are certainly true!

The first thing that comes into my mind when I think "Who am I?" is: I am a musician. Above everything else I am a musician. When I was 12 years old I was a nobody. I was shy and weak. People in school treated me as a fool and I never raised my voice against that. But then I learned to play the drums and I was really good! Someday I noticed that there is something I can do better than everyone else at this school! I had no reason to hide or to act shy. Drumming made me strong, I got a lot of self-confidence. Still I identify myself with music! Music is my life! I will make music all my life! I hope I can motivate my children to play musical instruments! I would play with them together as a family band!

I am interested in philosophy! I read many books about that. You know, I will work as a natural scientist one day, but in my opinion the natural science is impossible without philosophy. Especially nowadays it is very important to ask philosophical questions before doing research (for example ethical aspects in genetics, cloning and so on...). Another aspect is the need of philosophy for daily life. I am sure it can help me to be happy when thinking about philosophy.

In my opinion buddhism is not a religion but a philosophy. I am very fascinated of buddhism, although there are some aspects I don't agree with (for example the reincarnation...). After all I am a scientist who wants to understand the world. But the world is not only made of matter (chemistry, physics) but also of spirit and magic. Spirit and magic are produced by mankind, but I am human, so I really want to find out everything about this aspect. Maybe when I am very old I will understand what this world is made of and what is the meaning it all.

I believe I consist of three parts: my mind, my body and my soul. My mind is what I think, what I decide, what I do, what I say, and so on. My body is the biological part. My soul is my "spirit". The basis for all is the health of my body, without a perfectly working body I can not survive. So I look very carefully for my health. I eat only healthy things (fruits, fresh vegetable, not too much meat, some fish, as less fat as possible), I go swimming five times a week, I never smoke and don't drink too much. I also try to train my mind with thinking.

Some people (for example my mother) tell me, I think too much. I always have a theory for everything, but they say I don't need. I should concentrate on "living", not only thinking. But I know that there must be a theory for every experience. My life is long enough, I have enough time to think! And since I am a child I know I can not switch off my brain like switching off the light. I can not stop thinking. And of course this is not the only thing I am doing. I am living! This is most important for my third part, for my soul. My soul can develop only in experiencing life. So I believe my three parts belong together very close, one single part could not exist without the others.

My birth was on October 9th in 1981. It is also the birthday of John Lennon from The Beatles (you know him?), but he was shot in 1980. He is the most famous musician at that time, so maybe this day is a good symbol for me... When my father drove home from the hospital by car, he listened to the radio and they played the song "Happy birthday" by Stevie Wonder. Funny... Music was always somehow important in my life. I was born in Warendorf, a small town near Münster. It was 9:50 am (5:40 pm in Korea). My parents are Reinhold Mehlich (born in 1947) and Renate Ladiges (since she is married with my father her name is also Mehlich) (born in 1948). Both are working for the german post company, my mother in a post office, my father delivers the mail.

My first home was in Freckenhorst. This village was next to Warendorf, about 8,000 inhabitants at that time. I lived with my parents and my two half sisters (my father was married to another woman and got two daughters, Cathrin (1970) and Tanja (1973), with her, then he got divorced and married my mother) in a small appartment. During the following months I developed well. I learned to walk at the age of 9 months, much too early. Because since that moment I was in big danger! I was so curious about everything and now I was able just to walk there! One time I was outside with my babysitter (my parents were at work and a neighbour cared for me...). There was a small river and I was running just into it! My babysitter could not stop me and I was lying inside the water. Fortunately my neighbour could pull me outside fast enough, maybe otherwise I would be dead now... It was very cold and for the next three weeks I was ill! I am still that curious, but when I got older I learned to be careful as well...

When I was one and a half year old, I moved with my family to the countryside. We rent a nice small house between two villages. It belongs to Hoetmar (2,000 inhabitants). The house has many rooms, a big garden and some grassland for some animals. It was wonderful! So much space for me! And so many things to explore! Just after moving there I had my worst accident (I never got that heavily injured again!): I as sitting on a bench and fell down. I hit the ground with my chin, my teeth were hit together, but my tongue was between my teeth, so there were some holes in my tongue. I was heavily bleeding! I don't remember that, but my parents told me. It was not that bad. So I am very lucky to tell you that I never got seriously injured. But I was very often very close to that. As you can imagine I was often climbing on trees, walking alone through the nearby forests or playing next to a river... I am still surprised that nothing bad happened!

I grew up with the nature. I learned a lot about trees, flowers and animals. And I loved them! I was playing outside everyday, I never cared for the weather. I love sunshine same as snow or thunderstorm (oh, thunderstorm even is my favourite weather!). And we had so many animals. On the countryside there are of course all kinds of insects (bugs, butterflies, dragonflies, bees, hornets,...), but also mice, rats, owls, bats, all kind of birds, and so on. We had cats, dogs, chicken, geese, and ducks. In the middle of the 80s we had 4 sheep and two goats with two baby-goats. We also had three pigs (but one after the other, not at the same time). And all the time we had two horses. My sisters were riding and my father had a carriage. There are soooo many funny stories about the animals! I will tell another time!

To complete the story of my family: In 1987 my younger sister Julia was born. Six people and all the animals... the family was complete. From 1985 to 1988 I went to the kindergarden and in 1988 I entered the primary school in Hoetmar. Before my sister was born my mother was working in a post office in Hoetmar. I remember vividly when I went with her on saturday (the kindergarden is closed on saturday). All the people coming to the post office knew me after some time. I was always playing behind the counter... It was so much fun! I often got small presents from the customers.

In primary school I didn't have many friends. OK, I was invited by other class mates to their birthday partys, I invited them to mine, sometimes we met and played together... But I was never the "dominant" part in class. I was very good in primary school, I had good marks, especially in Mathematics. I was living on the country side, most of the other pupil came from the town. Maybe that is the reason why I was often playing on my own. They could not visit me, it was too far. But on the other hand there was an advantage to live in the countryside: There was so much space, so many things to do. And our animals. My friends loved to play at my house!

I think I have to explain the german school system to you. At the age of six a child enters primary school. After four years school is changed and there are three kinds of school to choose between. The lowest level is called "main school" (simply translated from german...). A little bit higher level is called "Realschule" (I really don't know an english translation... there is none). The highest level is called Gymnasium (don't be confused, it has nothing to do with the sports ground...). The two lower level schools are visited for six years, Gymnasium lasts nine years (the last three years are like high school). Because of my good marks my teachers in primary school told my parents to send me to Gymnasium. So in 1992 I entered the Gymnasium Laurentianum in Warendorf (the town near Hoetmar, where I was born, Hoetmar has no other school than the primary school...). I continued being very successful. I had good marks and the teachers liked me. And still I had only a few friends, but very good friends!

My youth was just very usual. From time to time I fell in love with a girl, but I was too shy to ask her, I found out that I am a musician and entered the school's BigBand. I took part in a scientific competition for young pupil and was member of the pupil's council. I learned three foreign languages: English (nine years), Latin (five years) and French (two years). French I learned volunteerly, I think this was the only mistake I made in school. A little bit later I found out that I prefer the natural sciences. The last three years are called "Oberstufe" (upper grade), this was the best time of all! I could select my subjects, I mainly chose natural sciences like chemistry, biology and mathematics. I also had "Music education", which was very important! I got really good marks in music, because I learned to play musical instruments (drums and piano). So my average mark at the end of school was quite good. The language subjects were not so good, but music and chemistry where much better!

I finished the school in 2001 with the so called "Abitur". This is the final degree when finishing Gymnasium (like High school), with that it is possible to enter University.

In school I met Hyun-A, who was my girl-friend for five years. She is the reason why I am interested in Asia so much.

I enjoyed my time at Gymnasium very much. I think the german school system made me strong. I was tought to have an own opinion, to make use of my brain, to find out who I am and what I want. It made me live! Much more than my parents did. I want to say "Thank you, Laurentianum!".

My 19th birthday. Annika (a very emotional german girl) was my ex-girlfriend at that time. And Hyun-A (an emotionless Korean) was my girlfriend. Both give me the same birthday present: a book called "Emotional intelligence" by Daniel Goleman. But they had different intentions. Annika told me "Read this and change yourself!" and Hyun-A said "Read this and stay as you are!". Finally Hyun-A was right. Annika was wrong. Annika thought that in the book it says "Let your emotions go! If you feel something, express it without limitation!". But it was not true. In the book it said "Gain power from the positive emotions and control or solve the negative emotions!", which was Hyun-As statement also.

Annika always said, it is quite human to loose temper and to shout and scream when being angry. And she wanted me to "be human" and express all my emotions. But I tried to express only my positive emotions, like happiness or astonishment. I tried to control my negative emotions, because I realised they always have only bad effects: anger made other people also angry or sad, sadness made me feel powerless, greed or envy made me do evil deeds. Also in my family I learned: be considerate! Do not make everything with too much emotion, but think about it first. Annika was the first one who told me "You are so reasonable!" with a negative meaning. Before I always heard it in a positive context. But in my opinion "emotional" is not the opposite of "rational". Emotion and ratio always work together. But emotion is faster, so people do "emotional" deeds and it seems they did not think (ratio) about consequences or the sense of their action.

Hyun-A was absolutely different. She seemed to be completely emotionless, like a stone or a block of ice. It was much easier with her, she never got angry. When we quarrel we simply discuss about what happened or what is wrong. And we come to a conclusion very fast. We always used our brains when quarreling, finding arguments, listening to the other, trying to understand the other and finally find an agreement (= solve the problem). This is the advantage of being emotionless. But on the other hand she also never showed joy or happiness. She seemed to be callous or even apathetical. It was very difficult to make her smile or even laugh. Or people might say, she was not so natural... Always controlling herself, never "letting herself go". As I said: with negative emotions this is very useful, but not with positive ones.

So I believe the best is the middle between these two possibilities (as usual). Emotional intelligence consists of five parts:

• Self-awareness - the ability to read one's emotions and recognize their impact while using feelings to guide decisions.

• Self-motivation - enthusiasm at work and daily life, the ability to cheer for oneself.

• Self-management - involves controlling one's emotions and impulses and adapting to changing circumstances.

• Social awareness - the ability to sense, understand, and react to other's emotions while comprehending social networks.

• Empathy (or Relationship management) - the ability to inspire, influence, and develop others while managing conflict.

I think all these things can be trained - and should be trained. They are essential for good physical and mental health, for having good relationships and for leading a good life with a peaceful soul. I want to say something concerning the self-management: It would be absolutely wrong to "hide" or "suppress" emotions. People can get very sick when they treat their emotions in a wrong way. But just letting them out is also not good in some cases, so it is necessary to control them. Solve emotions, never remove them.

I want to point out: This is my opinion. Maybe it is wrong, maybe it is right. I do not know. But I never want to tell you this like "You should do it like I say!". I am not a teacher! I am not so clever! I just state my opinion here, my thoughts. I hope you got an idea of it, but I wish you also have your own idea.

Let me explain my research work to you. Maybe you do not understand the chemical background, but it is not so important.

Do you know "potato printing" from the Kindergarden? Potatoes are cut into two halfs and on the inside a pattern is cut with a knife. For example you can cut your name into it. Then you put colour on it and print it on a paper. You can print again and again.

I do the same, but with a little difference. Instead of potatoes I take polymer stamps. The pattern on the stamps is in the nanometer scale, so very very small. The eye can not see the pattern, I have to use special microscopes to make it visible. The "ink" is not paint, but a solution of molecules. And the "paper" is not real paper but glass with special other molecules on the surface. The molecules on the stamp and on the glass undergo a chemical reaction. With this method I can pattern a surface in a certain way. There are many applications in medicine, nanotechnology, industry (for example car coatings...) or life science.

For example: Criminals can be caught easier: A trace of DNA has to be checked on a special proteine array. Right now the preparation of such an array is very expensive and difficult. With my method it would take only some minutes to make it. Or car coatings: I can pattern the surface of a car with special colourful molecules. These molecules can be "switched on and off". Imagine you could press a button to change the colour of your car. In the morning you feel you want a red car, then you can make it red. The next morning you can switch it to blue or whatever... Maybe this is possible with my method ;)

I hope I do not bother you when talking about Philosophy. But it is part of me. I think very much, so I want to show you the wonderful and endless world of thinking! Sometimes there are useless discussions and misunderstandings because the people have different definitions of the same word. So first it is very important that I tell you what is Philosophy from my point of view.

There are problems and questions you can not solve or answer with the "usual" sciences. Questions like "What is good or evil?", "What is justice?", "Is there a God?", "Do people have an immortal soul?" or "What is the sense of life?". Biology is the science of life, but it can not determine what is the "entity" of living things, whether and when organism may be killed or what are the dutys and rights of human life. With physics and mathematics natural laws can be expressed, but the question, if nature follows laws at all, can not be answered by natural science. The jurisprudence (science of law) can investigate and determine, if something obeys a written law, but it is not able to find out what should be a useful law. Finally there are problems at the limit of thinking, for example the question, if now (at this moment) the experienced reality really exists. In all these cases the explanations of the sciences are not sufficient, all these questions are philosophical questions.

Philosophy deals very often with topics that sound self-understanding on the first sight in daily life: "You should not kill someone", "Democracy is the best of all political systems", "Truth is, what is verifiably correct", "The world is, what exists in the universe" or "The thoughts are free". In the moment, in which these statements are doubted, in which the unquestionable becomes questionable, Philosophy is born. People who never doubt anything will never be open for Philosophy. The "amazement", the childish "astonishment", the doubts about the world or about oneself: all this can be the beginning of philosophical thinking.

The ancient greek Philosopher Platon illustrated the human curiosity like this:

"The astonishment is the property of a man who loves wisdom truely, yes, there is no other beginning of Philosophy than this one!"

Platons student Aristoteles pointed out:

"Astonishment made the people philosophise - at the beginning and still today!"

In difference to religion, religious communities or worldviews, the philosophy is based only upon the reason (or rationality). When thinking about philosophical questions only rational argumentation is used, no other assumptions (like faith in a basic dogma) is required. With other words: All you need to do is use your brain.

Philosophy can not be defined universally valid, because everyone who is philosophising develops an own point of view. That means, on philosophical questions the number of answers is the same as the number of people answering them. The german philosopher Carl Friedrich von Weizsäcker once said "You can not talk about Philosophy if you do not perform it!"

Many people perform philosophy for themselves: in order to understand the world they are living in, in order to have a reason or a basis for their acting and for their worldview. People who philosophise seriously ask critical questions to the environment and usually are not easily manipulated or cheated. A self-determined and reasonable life on the basis of self-thinking is the aim of many philosophising people. On the one hand Philosophy has the aim to give wisdom, that means the mind can react on everything that happens in a good way and is never confused. On the other hand it is a kind of lifestyle, that means all results of philosophical thinking are expressed in the behaviour in daily life.

Very often people think that Philosophy is a very abstract thing, that is far from reality, but that is not true. Finally all philosophical thoughts should result in the life of the thoughtful person. It means, people are able to control their life after thinking the "right" thoughts. What are the "right" thoughts? A very philosophical question... With other words: The unity of theory and practice is very important in Philosophy. The difference between people who perform Philosophy and those who do not is NOT, that the Philosophers have more useful knowledge, but usually they have a better overview about all existing arguments and points of view. It is easier for them to find an opinion and finally to decide what to do with the lifetime.

As you know, music means much for me! I told you how music made me strong when I was young and how much I enjoy playing drums or piano or singing. This time I try to explain the feeling when giving a concert, because this is a very special moment.

It starts in the afternoon when setting up the equipment. It is much work (bringing the equipment and the instruments from the practice room to the bar where we play, setting it up there on the stage), but there is already a trace of excitement! The atmosphere in the club is great and we already think about the evening. We hope that enough people will come and that they like our songs... Then usually there are some technical problems: some equipment does not work and we quickly have to find a solution! Then we are really stressed! But finally everything works.

We give a soundcheck, that means we play a song to hear if the sound is good in the bar and if all instruments have the same loudness. Then we have to be quiet because the first guests come. Now we usually get drinks and food from the owner of the bar. We relax, in high expectation of the concert. In this moment I always think I forgot all the songs. I can not remember them. I couldn't tell anyone what I have to play in the songs. I get a little nervous, but I already know from my experience with other concerts (I already had about 200 concerts in my life...) that during the concert I remember the songs again. It is just this excitement. Sometimes there is another band playing first. We can compare their music to ours of course. You know... if the first band is really really good, then it is very difficult for us to impress the audience.

And then it is our turn. We exchange the equipment a little (the first band use their own equipment, we remove it and put ours on stage), and then someone sais "And now have fun with EXIT ILLUSION!!!". And then we start! In this moment I forget everything! I forget chemistry, philosophy, Korean, all knowledge, all numbers, even my birthday! My mind is completely empty! I only feel the music. No, I AM the music! It is amazing! For 90 minutes I leave this world and fly through the universe of music, just play and play and play! Psychologists call it "flowing". I am flowing in the music, in our songs. Everything I do, the drums I beat, comes out automatically, I never think about it! Of course I have to concentrate a little and also listen to what the others play, react on mistakes or special situations, but finally I let myself go! It is a wonderful moment! 90 minutes of ecstasy!

After the concert I realise how much I am sweating. Usually my shirt is soaking wet! My heart beats fast and I am heavily breathing. But it feels so perfect! First the four band members say "Congratulations for a great concert!" to each other. Then our friends come and tell us if they liked it! Some say "That was wonderful!". This moment is pure happiness! To know I just played a great concert, did a good job on the drums and made other people happy with my music. And... I must confess... I still can play drums very well, and some people tell us that the band is very lucky to have such an amazing drummer. When I hear that I am so proud and happy...

A concert evening like this is so wonderful, I never want to miss it! I hope I can make music all my life.